Happily Ever Before…


As a little girl, I was obsessed with the concept of happily-ever-after. I went through the Disney Princess phase where I read the books over and over again and spent hours dreaming of a prince who would come and kiss and rescue me from whatever unhappiness I was experiencing in that moment and season. Eventually I got older and life, mistakes and hurts got in the way and I stopped dreaming for a long time.

Recently, I begun dreaming again (from a place of maturity this time and without the princesses 🙂 ) but I dreamt from a place of fear because I was terrified of inheriting generational curses or making the same mistakes my parents did. I held that mindset until today when Transformation Church‘s Pastor Michael Todd dropped Part 5 “Happily Ever Before” from his Relationship Goals Reloaded sermon series!

Let’s get to it!

Copy of lost

I kid you not! I sat up a bit straighter in my seat when Pastor Mike dropped that bomb.

Did you know that a helper was the seventh (7th) thing God gave to man!

When he dropped that nugget, my mouth fell open! This means that there were six (6) other things that God wants to give to us before the person! These 6 components of your happily-ever-before become the foundation you need to become a helper to your person in your happily-ever-after. Here they are:

#1 – God’s Presence

“A relationship without a goal is pointless but a relationship without God is senseless.” – Pastor Michael Todd

When God breathed His breath into Adam, in Genesis 2:7, and Adam opened his eyes for the very first time, he was in God’s presence. We are called to acknowledge and dwell in God’s presence in our happily-ever-before. This relationship with God should become the foundation of our happily-ever-afters. Pastor Mike also cautioned us that we should choose persons who don’t know how to get into the presence of God. A man in God’s presence knows how to lead his helper because God directs him. A woman in God’s presence knows how to help her man because God shows her.

#2 – A Place

“Your favour is found where God placed you, not where you prefer.” – Pastor Michael Todd

Out of all the world He had made, Genesis 2:8 tells us that God placed Adam in a garden He made. The place where God placed him had nothing to do with Adam’s preference! In our happily-ever-before we are called to a place by God where we are expected to be content and serve from a place of grace. Though sometimes hard, that place is meant to birth something in you that is needed for your future places. Stay in your place until God tells you it’s time to move.

#3 – Provision

“If the place you are in have no provision from God, you may be in the wrong place.” – Pastor Michael Todd

Where God placed Adam, He made provisions (Genesis 2:9). God’s place for you is confirmed by His provision in that place. No matter how dry the season is, God will provide because He placed you!

A quick note: Like the Israelites in the wilderness who enquired about manna (What is it?), the provision made by God may not be to your taste but it is guaranteed to sustain you.

#4 – Personality (Identity in Him)

“If your identity is not defined by God, it will be defined by others.” – Pastor Michael Todd

We were made to be a reflection of God’s image (Genesis 1:26). God wants to shape your personality (identity) in your happily-ever-before. He wants to give us an identity in Him. This is the reason why we need to spend more time in His presence. Through God’s cultivation of our personality, He is able to refine us.

#5 – Purpose

“Purpose is revealed as you work in your current season/place.” – Pastor Michael Todd

God gives you purpose before the person! In Genesis 2:15, Adam is placed in the garden to tend and watch over it. His purpose was to tend, meaning to “pay attention and apply himself” to the things of the garden. Purpose is revealed as you pay attention and apply yourself to what is in front of you right now in the place that God placed you and made provision for you. Your purpose may have less to do with what you are doing and more to do with how you are doing it. For example: Joseph learned stewardship whilst in the house of Potiphar and the prison and it became this thing he needed to govern Egypt during the drought. Don’t discount the things that God is counting on. Your purpose is not just a destination. It is a journey.

#6 – Parameters

“God gives us parameters to protect us and build something in us.” – Pastor Michael Todd

The last thing God gave Adam, before Eve came along, was parameters. In Genesis 2:16, Adam was told that he could eat freely of every tree except one. This parameter was for Adam’s protection. In your happily-ever-before, you must learn God’s parameters for you in the season you are in.

The Point?! I promise there is one 🙂

God wants us to have our happily-ever-afters. There is just one thing (well 6, depending on how you look at it…), He wants us to get the foundation right. Imagine what can happen when two people come together and each has a defined personality through time in God’s presence and is operating in purpose in the place that God set them and made provision for them, within the parameters set by God. I call that a happily-ever-after to behold! To get there, we have to get the foundation, our happily-ever-before God-aligned.

If you want to catch the sermon, click on the video below. You can thank me later. 🙂

Thank you for stopping by and reading. Have you found your happily-ever-before? I would love to hear about your experience in the comments section, below. 🙂

“May the Lord bless you and protect you. May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you. May the Lord show you His favour and give you peace” – Numbers 6: 23-26


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I am a dynamic young lady who loves the Lord and seek to have a joy that no one can take away. My all-time favourite thing to do is gaining discoveries by design from My Father during our time each day. Reading, learning and trying new things falls behind in a close second place. My dream is to use my God-given talents to positively impact as many people as possible. As a proud Wolmerian, with a zest for life, I adhere to the “Age Quod Agis” motto in that whatsoever I do, I always do it to the best of my ability.

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