Early last year, I grew to love someone romantically for the first time in years. He was perfect not because I couldn’t see his imperfections but because I did and I still wanted him. He made my day brighter just by being in it. He had the incredible ability to frustrate me in equal proportions as his ability to do something totally ridiculous that would have me squealing with laughter until tears ran down my face or smiled until my jaws hurt. He loved to make me smile! In his words, “What’s the world without the prettiest smile from the prettiest girl?”

He was the first man I’ve been involved with who wanted to pray with and for me. Although most of the times, he was thousands of miles away, travelling, there was never a night that we did not speak or a journey that he did not call to check that I had made it.

He understood that I wasn’t perfect but still he saw perfection in me despite my imperfections. He listened when I spoke. We spoke about the hard topics. We learned to agree to disagree on stuff that we both felt strongly about. He supported, motivated and pushed me to my limits. He was the type of guy who would spend hours learning and quizzing me about a topic that he knew nothing about just because I had an exam coming up. He made me want to be a better person on all levels. He forced me to be brave and let my voice be heard. He made me see the world in a more different and exciting way.

This guy was perfect! Incredibly, we synced and fit on everything but one…the one thing that turned out to be the deal-breaker. Before I knew it, I was planning to let my perfect guy go, overruling his protestations that he wanted me more than some childhood dream. Yet, I couldn’t bear the thought that maybe, just maybe, one day that special glow in his eyes, when he looked at me, would die when the conclusion sunk in that I was really serious and wouldn’t give him the one thing he has yearned for for as long as he could remember. And so, dying a little inside, I let him go and I walked away without looking back. We haven’t spoken since…

My heart aches whenever I hear a woman say that there are no good men out there. I know that’s a lie because I had one and he treated me as his queen. The queen in me rose and aligned to the king in him. But, before I could get there, the queen in me had to be readied so that she would see, acknowledge and respond wholesomely to the king he is. Only then did the incredible and rare thing occurs where we both connected, fitted and synced on another level. This is an experience I wish for all ladies. Only, when you find him, may you get to keep him.

 

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May the Peace of God go with you!

XOXO
Chañel

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