Weird First Dates Part 2: Mr. Inappropriate

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Now I believe I’m a reasonable female but there are some things I find very disrespectful. For example, being continually on your phone when someone takes the time out of their busy schedule to be with you is very rude and disrespectful.

Tonight I will tell you the story of my first and only date with a guy I will call Mr. Inappropriate. I was well on my way to getting over Mr. Jar-of-Hearts when my interfering friend decided that I needed a helping hand in getting back into the dating world. After a month of pleading, cajoling and emotional blackmail, I said yes and agreed to meet the lucky young man at my favorite pizza spot.

When I entered Pizza Hut, I felt like I was in a scene from Twitches. You know that scene where the man with the speaker-phone voice is on his phone and boasting of his accomplishments and Tia and Tamara punishes him with a spell? Well it seemed I had entered in the middle of a movie production because there was this handsome young man speaking on his phone quite loudly. People were literally glancing in his direction. It was then I noticed to my chagrin that he wore the prescribed outfit that we had agreed on. I wanted nothing better than to take off the white headband I was wearing and make my escape.

Too late because he noticed me and motioned for me to join him. As I approached I heard him tell the person on the phone, “dawg shi look good, mi will text yuh.” I sat down uncomfortably and then my nightmare began. After introducing himself, he proceeded to talk about himself. He talked and talked and talked some more. When he was finished with that topic he went on to talk about all my parts that he found pleasing. All this in his speaker-phone voice. The phrase melting from embarrassment took on a whole new meaning for me. On top of everything, every few minutes, his phone would vibrate and he would stop to send a message.

I found myself gritting my teeth to keep from giving him a piece of my mind. Why? Because my mother raised me right. That didn’t stop me from mentally slapping my friends silly.

My docility changed when I felt something rub against my leg. At first, I thought it was my imagination then I felt it again. The night had gone from bad to worse. The young man was trying to play footsie while speaker-phoning my face. I had had it!!! My temper got the best of me. I kicked him in the shin, grabbed my stuff and left.

It was afterwards that I realized I had left him to settle my bill. My friends got an earful that night that is all I will say on the matter.

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I am a dynamic young lady who loves the Lord and seek to have a joy that no one can take away. My all-time favourite thing to do is gaining discoveries by design from My Father during our time each day. Reading, learning and trying new things falls behind in a close second place. My dream is to use my God-given talents to positively impact as many people as possible. As a proud Wolmerian, with a zest for life, I adhere to the “Age Quod Agis” motto in that whatsoever I do, I always do it to the best of my ability.

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